Sunday, 15 November 2009

Life's too short

A very dear friend of mine died last week. She was still very young, with a teenage son, and leaves behind her many people saddened by the loss.

Yet every single one of those people are so thankful to have crossed paths with her and been blessed with the beautiful friendship she was always so ready and willing to offer. Despite being in unimaginable pain at times, she always managed to reach out a hand of love and comfort to others, no matter who they were or how they had met, and she was a true inspiration to many.

Indeed, when I held a "writer's group" a couple of years back to encourage others to find the joy in writing, she was so overwhelmed and overjoyed by the freedom she found in realising that every writer has their own "ingredients" and makes their own "recipes"... one person may make a fantastic carrot cake but struggle with a chicken curry, whilst two people may make chocolate brownies and each have different people enjoy theirs best, despite them being so similar. She was a real inspiration to me as I led this group and I cannot tell you how beautiful some of the things she wrote were.

I only ever got to meet her once in person, as we met and kept in touch online for the most part. But that one weekend I spent in her company was so wonderful - I don't think I've ever laughed so hard, nor enjoyed such a "lazy" weekend. Spiritually she was a wonder, and inspired me in that way too: the videos she posted online and the pictures she created were astounding, so full of love and light.

Amazingly I didn't cry when I found out she had passed, despite having cried so desperately every day for about a week previously. In fact the day she died was the first day I didn't cry, which may seem strange to you, but to me it makes perfect sense... she was so full of love, the inspiration I felt when thinking back upon her life filled me with a quiet peace rather than sadness. Of course I was sad, don't get me wrong, but I was filled with love for her and what she meant to so many people.

I will miss her terribly, especially as I had wanted to go back and spend another weekend with her and invited her to our wedding so that she could meet Tim as well, but I know she will be with us in spirit. Even now she is inspiring me, as I realise that life really is too short to spend worrying... life is for living and we should never forget that, for she never did!!

My previous blog was called "Dream of Living"... seeing that title every time I logged on reminded me to keep hold of my dreams. I lost that sight for some time and my dreams began to be shunned for all manner of "responsibilities" and things... but now I feel it is time to reclaim them and really strive to fulfil them all.

Darling Josie, you were an inspiration to me throughout our friendship and I thank you for inspiring me still. I do not know what way my dreams will take me, but I know that I am now ready to grab hold and live the dream, right here, right now.

2 comments:

Yaya said...

I'm sorry for your loss.
(((Hugs)))

Jeanne said...

Amanda,

I am so sorry for your loss. Your post is a beautiful, loving tribute to your friend. I totally understand what you have described regarding the feeling of quiet peace. It is wonderful that Josie inspired you so. You are right that she will be with you in spirit at your wedding. Amanda, you are in my thoughts at this difficult time. This really is a lovely tribute to your friend, who clearly touched many lives and inspired many.

Blessings,

Jeanne

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